Mess and Marriage
Marriage.
It goes something like this. “Honey, (trying to keep the irritation out of my voice) what’s this pile of stuff that’s been sitting here for the last 5 days? Can I do something with it?” (Translation: When are you going to …..?)
And the response? “Just. Leave. It.”
Or even worse. “Why is it bothering you?” (Really? You have to ask that question?)
[READ: Q: How Can I Get My Family to Maintain Household Clutter Routines?]
Now I should know better. But, let’s be truthful here. I am much harder on my husband than I am with my kids. Frankly, I don’t live with them anymore. But, just to be fair, my husband has to live with me.
Our organizing styles could not be more different. I am a filer; he’s a piler. I’m a concealer; yes, he’s a revealer. You get the idea.
[READ: Do You Have Different Organizing Styles Living in Your Home?]
Now the research shows we are not alone. According to a survey in a recent issue of Consumer Reports Magazine, men and women say they are the most different from their partners when it comes to putting things away properly. Here are more interesting statistics. Over 40% of couples fight about messes. The two things that drive most people crazy when out of place? Keys and bills. And, who is messier? 39% say men and 26% say women. Interestingly, over 67% put items away or clean up if a partner leaves stuff out of place. Only 21% ask their spouse to straighten up. (We all know where I fall in this survey!)
[READ: Q: Marriage Communication is Vital, But My Spouse Won’t Talk]
So how do we resolve our organizing differences? With a lot of humor, compromising on shared spaces, letting the little things go, a large, clutter catch-all tray that lives on his side of the dresser, and a small, “man-caveish” room in our basement that I haven’t seen in years. The rest he leaves up to me.
Our secret to marital bliss!
Email me at Leslie@orderoochaos.com and let me know how you manage your mess and marriage.
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